Photo diary: Project 365, week 10

There's more colour now that the spring is here, and I just love seeing all the pretty flowers in town. I also have crocuses in the garden, though mine are of a "wild" variety. They just grow randomly around the garden and along the path, and I never take any care of them. The crocuses must have been planted originally many years ago by the previous owner of the house. Those that I planted myself didn't last beyond a couple of years, such a shame, as they were truly gorgeous. 

Eddie's been helping me with clearing the garden after winter. There's a lot of broken branches that need to be broken into smaller pieces to go into the recycling. The next project is to get rid of the moss from the garden path.

The Pancake Day usually makes me shrug my shoulders in bewilderment, as to why so many people eat pancakes only once a year, claiming it's not a healthy food? I appreciate it's not exactly a tofu salad with goji berries, but it can be as healthy or unhealthy as you make it, and the same people would have takeaways on a regular basis (not dissing takeaways either, my guys love Domino's pizza). 

We certainly have pancakes more often than once a year. And yes, my guys love it sweet, with berries, bananas and whipped cream. Sasha's favourite topping is a chocolate spread.

This is one of the photos I took for Bonne Maman pancake competition. The top pancake was made by using part of the batter with cocoa to make the writing. There were some pretty cool entries, so don't think we had a chance.

Wednesday was a very sad day, as we said Good bye to a young man. He was one of Sasha's class mates from his old school, from nursery to high school. I remember him as a little boy, and later, growing up. 

The funeral service took place at St Mary's Church in Bampton, the village, where some of the scenes from Downton Abbey were filmed. It is a beautiful old church. It dates back to the 9th C, with the spire built in the 13th C.

The church was packed full, with many people coming from school, college, the care team, etc. There was such a sense of community, with many parents from the special needs school, who have/had children there at one stage or another. I saw Sasha's former teachers and headmistress, wonderful people who genuinely love and care for all the children in school. I will always be grateful to many of them for teaching our boy and caring about him. 

It was a very emotional service, and I cried non-stop. Incredibly sad.

On Thursday a friend invited me over for tea, when Sasha went out with his PAs. She gave me tea and comforted me.

In the last few days I've been clearing one of the stone walls in the garden from the creepers. This is my yearly battle, but as it comes from the other side, and the neighbours cannot be bothered, it just keeps growing all over the wall and the old lilac tree. My worry is that at some point the wall will collapse, and it will cost an arm and a leg to repair it. 

I have finally finished Reasons to Stay Alive by Matt Haig. I've been reading this book on and off for more than two years, a few pages at a time, and it's not even that long. 

I am very fond of Matt Haig's books for children, and really wanted to like Reasons. It had amazing endorsements and gushing reviews. Sadly, I found it rather underwhelming, I just couldn't relate to it at all, despite my personal experience with depression, our son's acute anxiety, and quite a few close friends struggling with both anxiety and depression. I don't try to diss the book, if it helped even one person, all the kudos to the author. It's just I found the style of writing and message over-simplistic. 

It's splendid that Matt managed to mend himself without the aid of medication, but it's naive to think everyone can manage with yoga and meditation. Our son's anxiety is just about managed with meds; without them he'd be self-harming, and aggressive. 

Last year our boy was hurting himself so badly, we had to take him to A&E, looking for urgent help. They gave him some strong meds to calm him down. Later while still in the hospital, the doctor was talking to me alone. I was absolutely hysterical myself, shaking and crying, as I was terrified he would be sectioned. Medication was paramount in lowering his anxiety. 

Unfortunately, not everyone has a luxury of self-help without medication. I'm as much anti-phrama as you can be, but some people need medication to survive and live without suffering either physically and mentally. 

For me this book means one personal account of mental illness, honest and thought-provoking, however, certainly not a "necessary book" as it was promoted. I know I'm in a minority, and Reasons has become an almost iconic book of its genre.

Have you read it? Did you find it helpful?

Another book I read last week was The Girl Who Died by Ragnar Jonasson. 

After reading one Nordic Noir thriller set in Iceland, I fancied to read more in the similar vein. It actually turned out to be a mix of a thriller and a ghost story. 

The main character, Una, is a teacher, who applies to move for work for an academic year to a remote village of Skalar. Una wants to escape Reykjavik, where she feels lost and quite alone.

Skalar is tiny, its population is just ten people, including two children, who Una is going to teach. However, as soon as she arrives, the young teacher wonders if she's made a mistake. The locals are not exactly welcoming, apart from the lady, whose daughter is one of the students. 

The old house has its own unsettling atmosphere. Una's having nightmares, waking up to the visions of a young girl singing a lullaby. There is a ghastly story tied to the house, but nobody wants to tell Una what's happened here years ago.

And then a terrible tragedy happens, while Una and her pupils are holding a Christmas concert in the church. The villagers become even more hostile towards the teacher. 

The overall feeling of isolation, claustrophobia, is enhanced by the macabre supernatural element to the story. 

How was your week?

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